when the dust settles…

Have you ever been so excited about something that you work yourself up into a frenzy of emotion? Your mind is focused, your breath is caught in your lungs, waiting to exhale upon the point of impact. Your legs dance in excitement, you feel as if you are moving outside of your body, everything else going in slow motion.

I used to get that way about birthday parties. Then came the year where a party guest stole some of my presents.

I also used to get that way about Christmas. Then came the year I woke up the next day with a hangover and the realization that I had no desire to create any New Year’s resolutions that time around.

Hello, my name is Debbie Downer, and I am a anti-frenziholic.

(Hiiiiiii Debbie.)

I don’t want you to think I’m all kill-joy over here. Not true! However, now, my frenzied anticipation of things has dulled to a more manageable buzz. I still shriek with excitement when radio stations start their Christmas tunes. I still coo and purr when the mall begins their holiday decorating and Santa sets up camp at the food court. I still (secretly) cross my fingers each year around my birthday, hoping a friend or loved one will surprise me with a party or fabulous present. However, that buzz, like a bee’s life, is short lived, wearing off just before the event takes place. I’ve created this invisible shield, shrouding myself in a layer of realism (or pessimism?) so that when the high of the moment wears off, I’m not left covered in the disappointment of its finale. Is this wise? I’m not sure. On the one hand, it’s important to be excited, to be giddy and relish in the childlike wide-eyed naïveté. Yet, on the other hand, having a sense of realism is necessary to deal with lifes ups and downs. So, when that sale of your house falls through, or your Christmas dinner burst into flames in the oven, that realism coat of arms is there to protect you from the fire.

I still want to get excited about these things though (well, not the bursting into flames part), because life is about living, and enjoyment, and finding happiness and blessings in even the littlest moments. Yes, endings are sad (did anyone else cry at the Friends season finale? Just me??), but the journey there can be wonderfully amazing, and by not allowing myself to enjoy it, well…I’d be missing out on so much.

Just something to think about…

hearts and thoughtful hugs,

B.

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Comments

  1. Isn’t growing up sad? Although I am in a state of realism most of the time, I gotta say though I do still get really excited about three things… Christmas, ice cream, and vacations. I get all giddy and excited and can’t sit still I’m too excited to do anything else but bounce! Which is currently pretty darn close to the state I’m in with Poland only 2.5 weeks away… it will only get worse from here!
    Cheer up! There is still a lot to be excited about in life after childhood 😉

    • yeah I still get really excited about Christmas too! and vacations! But i just get so excited sometimes that when it’s over I get sad…:( haha

      and i know i have a lot to look forward to, I just hate the waiting!! I bet you are just squirming to get back to Poland! I’m so excited for you! (In a managed way, so as not to create disappointment 🙂 haha jk)

      • haha yeah i know what you mean when suddenly there’s no big things to look forward to. But guess what? u can create them! plan mini trips or shopping sprees 😉

    • yesssssss! and i actually have two mini trips planned! my yearly visit to my alma mater, and my marathon weekend! 🙂 thanks for the reminder!!

Trackbacks

  1. […] Words with Friends – Granted, this Iphone app is far from new, but I only recently jumped on the technologically savvy train and “purchased” this free app for my phone. My family are scrabble NUTS, and with all the studies on preventing Alzheimer’s with word games, I figured it was only benefitting me to spend the majority of my free time making words out of Q, A, and T…..So far, I’ve got about 5 games going at once, and can I say, every time I hear that “ding” on my phone, signalling my turn, I get a little excited? Not TOO excited, of course, but excited nonetheless! […]

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